Wednesday, May 25, 2005

Looking For My Moments

Sometimes right before I go to bed at night and as I lay in bed thanking God for everything he has given me, I feel so content, so at peace with myself and with the world around me. It’s at these very moments that I feel so close to God, and everything about this crazy world makes sense to me.

These moments I treasure so much, to me it means I am walking down the right path in my life. However, these past few weeks these moments have become so rare almost none existent, and this worries me and makes me wonder have I made a wrong turn somewhere.

Deep down I think I know why they’ve become less frequent. Life has gotten in the way of my usual rituals of always trying to be close to God, it seems lately there is no time for anything or maybe its totally something else. Maybe it’s just a phase that I think a lot of people go through where their faith lessens for a while, only to get back on track which sometimes can even make you closer to God.

Hopefully my need to feel close or at peace with God will return to me and these moments of craziness will pass quietly because I really want my sense of peacefulness to come back to me and I want to make sense of this world again.


At May 25, 2005 11:53 AM , Anonymous Anonymous said...

I can so relate to what your saying ,, i do the same ,, sometimes i get so caught up in the moment that my eyes starts to withdraw and tears start ,,

well ,, these moments go away ,, bu they come back ,,

u see God is wise ,, here is the thing ,, we humans make mistakes and sometimes loose faith .. but here is the thing i heard from a wise man the other day ,, he said look at how God is great ,, Since God knows we tend to be lazy and stuff ,, He stated ina in a certain time of year there is 7aj ,, then there is Ramadaan ,, then there is Zakaat ,, then other duties ,, all in certain times of year ,, you see He knows we get weak inside fa he strengthen us from time to time.

Keep the faith ,, and be good to yourself dont feel that sad ,,

i dont know what or how im gonna explain my deeds, sins , actions and lazziness.

At May 26, 2005 1:20 PM , Blogger illusion said...

I think you are right, these moments come and go. I guess because these moments are so beautiful, I want them to happen all the time.

At May 30, 2005 5:08 AM , Blogger Hope said...

Drifting sometimes does not mean you are loosing faith. have some hope ;)

At May 31, 2005 1:42 PM , Blogger illusion said...

Thanks for the encouraging words :)

At August 25, 2005 10:58 AM , Blogger Bull in a Chinashop said...

Ou est l'illusion, maintenant?

Surely, you can't be on summer hols since May or can you?

Bull in a China Shop

At August 27, 2005 8:52 AM , Blogger illusion said...

Well I was on vacation but not since May. I am lazy my dear friend, but hopefully I'll start to post again :)

By the way what happend to your blog?

At September 16, 2005 6:42 PM , Blogger Bull in a Chinashop said...

Because of popular demand:) I had no alternative but to jettison my blog into an already over-crowded blogosphere.
Beware of any blog-detritus that comes your way, though. Some claim it is a bio-hazard in the worst way possible.

At September 23, 2005 8:41 AM , Blogger illusion said...

Even if it has become over-crowded in the blog world, your thoughts and sense of writing style are unique so your blog would always have been different
Anyway I hope you do come back and share yourself with us again real soon :)


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